Beauty we couldn't live without seeing again

Simon Says: "Fuck it. Tax 'em"

I ran into one of those stories that just twists my mind into a writhing heap of WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO THAT FOR?

I can tell that this was an incredibly expensive endeavor, but I have no idea how much of it was paid for by taxpayers. The work was done at Dundee University and I am assuming that this is a public university that is at least partially funded by taxes. If I am wrong and this story has no right being discussed in a blog about what our tax dollars are spent on, then I guess I'll make the karmic withdrawal. Either way, you can't tell me this money wouldn't have been more appreciated by starving children somewhere in Africa that could have used a school instead.

Adrienne 'Face Painter' Barker realized she was working on a completely useless skill set and was unable to unleash her talents on an unsuspecting business as an employee. So she undertook a project to re-create the face of an Archbishop that died in 1381. Apparently, this guy was a real pioneer in taxing peasants and had his ass handed to him during the Peasant's Revolt. By having his ass handed to him, I mean he was pulled from the Tower of London by an angry mob and had his head chopped off. (Which reminds me... Aren't we past due for another Peasant's Revolt?)

It was SO important to understand what the good Archbishop looked like that Adrienne wasn't going to just get some artists rendering done, oh no. Some excerpts of the process she undertook:
1.) used skeletal detail from the part-mummified skull to build up his facial features
2.) carry out an initial assessment of the skull to determine its age, sex and ancestry
3.) then made a series of 3D bronze resin casts of his head
4.) sculpted each muscle of the face and built this up on the cast
5.) adding a final layer which represents the skin

What drives me batty are a couple of key phrases in the story like her title of Forensic Artist. It comes down to two simple things: One, who cares and how is it important to be able to gaze upon the face of a fellow who died 630 years ago? Two, it is a model, a rendering, an interpretation - to use their term, a "reconstruction." Its not what the guy actually looked like. Period.

The bust will be on display in a church. I would hope, but doubt that it will remind the current Archbishop that he doesn't own the people just because that is how his bosses interpret their bibles.

And I exit with a quote from the artist herself:
"I hope people in Sudbury like what we've done but he's a strange looking fellow so it'll be interesting to see their reactions."

Indeed. I certainly hope they like it. And I really hope that you enjoy seeing their reactions. Otherwise, this will all have been very pointless...

THIS is whybritspaytaxes.
read more:Face of Simon of Sudbury revealed by forensic artist(bbc)

Catching up on fails you pay for

That is some mighty fine driving. Thanks boys...

Time AND Money. Nice!

Bodies on the bus go round and round

Only because my bus driver label tag is underutilized, I present to you the story of a bus driver who killed 15 of his passengers on a bright March day.

Emergency personnel, cops, DAs, Governor Quomo, the National Transportation Safety Board, a Grand Jury, Judge Villegas, and the prison warden and guards all get involved because Ophadell 'I got this' Williams "was not only aware of what precautions to take but made a series of conscious decisions not to take them."

The very least you expect from your bus driver is for him or her to not kill you...

THIS is whyipaytaxes.
read more: Driver in NY bus crash charged with deaths of 15 passengers(REU)

Spoiled brat

I often hear that kids these days have no work ethic and that everything has changed since 'I' was a kid. (Place any 35 + year old in place of 'I')

I think I have some evidence of this phenomenon.

An 11 year old boy in Germany was told by his mother to clean up after himself. While we shouldn't place too much stock in the overbearing mother's side of the story, she apparently told the child to pick some papers off the floor that he had discarded there.

This outrageous request bordering on child abuse is unacceptable. This kid was mad as hell and he's not going to take it anymore. So he called the cops to report a case of forced labor. According to the police statement he claimed "I have to work all day long. I haven't any free time."

Luckily, the cops didn't over-react as they are often wont to do and this never absorbed any public servant's time beyond taking the call, talking to the mother, filing the report and answering calls from the media.

Taking calls from verwöhnte Kinder... (Google translate, don't fail me now!)

THIS is whyGERMANSpaytaxes.
read more:German boy, 11, calls police over housework(bbc)

Has anyone seen my experimental aircraft?

Wherever you go, there we are.

I'm not sure exactly how much I spent on it or what it was for, but I bought an experimental aircraft and the Department of Defense lost it.

I guess I'll just have to build another one... How else can I attack any target on the planet in under an hour?

I won't even mention the rocket fuel needed to launch this sweet ride...

THIS is whyipaytaxes.
read more:US military loses contact with hypersonic aircraft(bbc)

Cleanin up the streets

Your tax dollars at work Rockford!
Open wide, I think I see a little build up behind a molar.

The statue was built from donations, not taxpayer dollars. I would also assume the paint used by the vandal was not paid with taxpayer dollars, but that is far from guaranteed...

For the rest of the story, we see plenty of taxpayer dollars going to work.

1.) The statue, while commissioned from donations was placed, insured and is maintained by the parks department. (Yes, there is at least one rider in the city's insurance policy for this statue)
2.) The renaming of the park it stands in as further homage to the individual immortalized was taken care of by the parks department. (The individual immortalized is so honored for arranging fireworks displays and hanging christmas lights...)
3.) The city has a graffiti removal 'experts' team. This team is unable to fix this and had to call in an outside expert/vendor to analyze. This outside expert/vendor will also probably be the one to eventually clean it.
4.) The initial team of experts apparently wasn't called in until AFTER someone at the city was called in with a steamed water pressure washer. (shown above) Only then did they determine that the paint is automotive paint and ain't coming off without chemicals and sand blasters.
5.) The reason the government jumped into action prior to knowing what action was required is because there is a wedding this weekend in a nearby park. *gasp* We can't ruin the bride's special day booked in a public area by exposing her to what happens in public places!
6.) The tarp that will adorn this statue for the weekend also belongs to the parks department. At least it is a multi-use tarp and hopefully was not purchased just for this special occasion.

Nothing to see here, our city is pristine. Move along now.

7.) The police have been called in and are investigating. I imagine they have all their best men on the case.
8.) And a live report coming from a city employee downtown Rockford today reports seeing "the mayor, police chief, and about five cops surrounding the statue earlier today."

Vandalism riles up a city government real good...

THIS is whyrockfordianspaytaxes.
read more:Cleanup of Joe Marino statue in downtown Rockford is complicated(rrs)