If we can prevent the government from wasting the labor of the people
under the pretense of caring for them, they will be happy. - Thomas Jefferson


Tuesday, June 30, 2009

Oil for sale

Now that we've spent $683,942,908,585.08 (according to the zFacts ticker and links to the left at the top of this page at 2:22AM CST) on 'liberating' the Iraqis, its time they start reaping some of this fine Oil Money they been hearin' all about.

What do we get in return? Shoes thrown at us.

The Headline Reads:
Iraqi oil for sale in TV auction(bbc)
A goddamn auction between giants such as Royal Dutch Shell and Exxon Mobil for the rights to rape and pillage the land and oil reserves being aired on TV. This must be an exciting moment for them. (The Iraqis) (Well, the suits too...)

Aw fuck it.

THIS is whyipaytaxes.

Here's some fun quotes:
The US budget for Iraq in FY 2007 came to $4,988/Iraqi. This is triple Iraq's per-person GDP. It's like spending $121,000 per person ($484,000 per family of 4) in the US. Why not just bribe the whole country?

"If we don't stop extending our troops all around the world in nation-building missions, then
we're going to have a serious problem." — George W. Bush, Jan. 2001

What happened to kicking somebody's ass and taking their stuff? All the war, none of the spoils?

Saturday, June 20, 2009

Picking winners; choosing losers (pt. 3)

I knew back in October that it was a bad sign when the federal government started deciding which banks would succeed (with bailouts) and which banks would be allowed to fail. It seemed even scarier when the fed began deciding which industries it would help through these tough times while ignoring the others. Now the Fed has let all this power go to its head as it begins picking and choosing which facilities will be closed or remain open...

When the new GM team (You've seen the commercials we're paying for: They're not going out of business, they're getting down to business.) decided that the Norton parts distribution center in Massachusetts needed to be closed. It is not clear why they decided this center should be closed, but I'll bet it was more than a dart being thrown at a map of GM facilities.

However, there is a small chain of relevant circumstances that far outweigh their professionally analyzed conclusions which GM forgot to consider:
1.) Rep. Barney Frank represents Norton, Mass.
2.) Rep. Barney Frank heads the Financial Services Committee
3.) The Financial Services Committee pretty much owns GM now.
4.) Rep. Barney 'NIMBY' Frank doesn't like closing facilities in his district.

So, under the guise of being environmentally concerned, he visited the government-installed CEO GM employees calls boss, Fritz 'The Puppet' Henderson. In this meeting he explained to 'The Puppet' that he was just a puppet and that while just about anyone in our government can have a tug at his strings, Barney is one of the few puppet masters holding the strings up. Then, he explained that closing the facility in his district would increase global warming because those parts would have to be shipped to New England from Philadelphia instead. Not entirely inaccurate, but lets assume that in its place, the Phillie facility gets closed instead. Will that not mean that the Eastern Great Lakes region would have to get theirs shipped from New England?

And, of course, the boss gets what the boss wants. GM no longer finds it necessary to close that facility as a part of its re-structuring.

The government exerts supreme power over its new puppets under the guise of environmentalism, proving that regardless of what they say, our government IS in the business of running the automotive industry...
Not long ago, I respected Barney Frank.

THIS is whyipaytaxes.

Wednesday, June 17, 2009

When you wish upon a star

When an 18 year old Belgian girl went in to get a tattoo, she went all out. She got stars across half her face. There is no mention of what she was on when she thought this was a good idea, but... ... I imagine it was good.

When she got home to daddy she got the reaction she had hoped for, outrage. But, it turned out to be a bit more outrage than she was prepared to handle so she went into defense mode and explained to daddy that it wasn't her fault. She is indeed a victim and one that he shouldn't be so angry at anymore.

Her claim is that she had asked for 3 stars but had fallen asleep and woke up right exactly when he finished the 56th star. Now, correct me if I'm wrong, but isn't it just about fucking impossible to fall asleep when there is someone digging in your face with a needle stabbing you up to 3,000 times per minute? I'm sure she kinda got numbish in that area after awhile, but half of her face? (There is even one on her ear!)

His claim seems much more reasonable to me. After just about every star he stopped and asked her if she was certain she wanted him to continue, knowing full well that she would learn to regret this moment for the rest of her life. If you'll watch the BBC story clip, you'll even notice at the very end of the segment when they spend a tenth of the story time telling his side of the story, that he has her picture in his portfolio. In it, she is not smiling, but she is also not crying, running out of the parlor, or displaying any signs of distress. No, she's posing. Posing to display a job well done.

Of course, the moment she told her daddy the lie, she stuck to it and is suing the artist.

THIS is whybelgianspaytaxes.

read more: Belgian girl's tattoo 'nightmare' (bbc)

Psycho

That title is a reference to the movie. And, of course, this post...

When Mr[s]. Thomas Prusin-Parkin's (First flag: Dude with a hyphenated last name) mother died in 2003, he just couldn't bear to let her [identity] go. So, he provided the funeral director with a fake ss# and assumed her identity. Ever since her death, [s]he would put on a wig and some makeup, grab her walking stick and collect social security checks and rent subsidies, visit banks, appear in court[!], file for bankruptcy[!!], and renew her driver's liscense[!!!]. (He even got a friend to pose as a nephew while getting her liscense...)

The late Mrs. Prusik still gettin' her shit done.

In the end, Tom 'Mom' Prusin-Parkin collected over $115,000 directly from the government. No totals were given on the material gains on the bankruptcy...

At least no one got stabbed while taking a shower!

THIS is whyipaytaxes...

read more: US man 'posed as his dead mother' (bbc)

Wednesday, June 10, 2009

Fashion Police Strike Again

While there are a LOT of people out there that shouldn't wear short shorts, it is my opinion that no one should go to jail for wearing them...

However, a judge in Kentucky wouldn't see it my way as she sentenced a woman to 3 days in jail (My Cousin Vinny style) for wearing short shorts (Far from Daisy Dukes) to her hearing.

Don't get me wrong, she's no prize: She had been warned about her wardrobe before and she was in there for something like drunk driving into a grave stone.
However, jail? For 3 days? Your tax dollars at work!

THIS is whykentuckianspaytaxes.

watch the story: wkyt

Do as I say (Not as I do)

Its a short one. I'll just cut n paste the intro which says it all:
A Maryland state delegate who called for "DUI" license plates that would be issued to people convicted more than once of drunken driving has been charged with driving under the influence himself. (fox)

While he may be a hypocrite, at least his plan for DUI license plates warrants some consideration...

Sunday, June 7, 2009

When 72 year old great grandmothers go bad

Much like the 70 year old woman who got beat down in Utah last year because her lawn was not the appropriate shade of green, a cop in Texas recently tasered a 72 year old woman for refusing to sign a speeding ticket even though she was not required to do so by law.

Well, she started swearing enough to make the cop blush. And what else is a cop supposed to do when he is driven to blushing? The Taser, yeah yeah, the Taser.

In a situation where a fully grown man, trained to handle himself in emergencies, decides to incapacitate a little old lady with tens of thousands of volts of electricity, its the 72 year old woman who goes to jail for resisting arrest.

Testosterone befuddled police salaries and the court cases and jail terms they create...

THIS is whyipaytaxes.

Friday, June 5, 2009

Fallout boys

It has been more than 50 years since the British government thought it might be a good idea to take their bored troops, send them far away, (Easter Island, Australia, and others) and make them watch nuclear explosions. To be fair, some were allowed to wear sunglasses.
(The U.S. did the same, but we passed an act to provide compensation in the 1960 Radiation Exposure Compensation Act)

Rather than own up, the government has gone through various stages of denial. However, they must have figured out that enough of them have already died and that it might not be so catastrophic to compensate those who remain.

Rather than compensate the remaining victims, the High Court has ruled that these ex-servicemen are able to sue the government for compensation. Yes, even when they admit defeat, the ex-servicemen must go through the time and effort of suing the government to be compensated for being government issued guinea pigs over 50 years ago.

Years of denial, now years of trial. At least they can be proud of the actual compensation claims paid out...

THIS is whyBRITSpaytaxes.

Read More: Nuclear veterans win right to sue

Thursday, June 4, 2009

Advertising for souls

I don't think I'm alone in this assumption:
ANY organization that can afford to run full page ads in a national magazine such as Newsweek (Current rate for a 4-color full page ad: $226,590) can probably afford to pay their fair share of taxes.

Can someone please explain to me why churches don't have to pay taxes? Anyone?
Especially now that they are competing with non-government-subsidized businesses for ad space? You can't tell me there isn't a medium sized business or two out there that would LOVE to buy some ad space in Newsweek but paid their taxes instead...

Helping churches harvest souls.

THIS is whyipaytaxes. (so they don't have to)